Before Asher was born, I was pretty confident in my abilities to care for a baby. During my growing up years my mom always took care of other people’s kids and I was there to
help get in the way and learn. And Collin and I have nieces and nephews galore. I’ve burped, rocked, changed, and played with more babies than I can remember. My sisters may have accused me of being a baby hog at more than one family gathering. So when I was pregnant, I was nervous about and preparing for the labor and delivery, but when it came to actually caring for our boy, I thought, “How hard can it be? We can totally do this.”
<I’m sure you are laughing at my naiveté right now. Go ahead. I’m laughing too.>
And then Asher was born. And we quickly found that there was more to it than we had anticipated. You don’t just feed the baby. We have to make decisions about when and what and how much to feed him. Wait a minute, this is way different than my sister passing off her little one and saying, “Here, feed him this.” We have to figure out how to get the boy to sleep and when he should go to sleep and for how long. And where. And how dark and warm and quiet is should or should not be in the room. But… I thought you just rocked him for half a minute and sang a song and that was it? Also, we thought that if we wanted to go somewhere and do something, we wouldn’t let him hold us back, we would just take him with us! But when you’re faced with the decision of staying home and keeping him happy or taking him somewhere and him getting so tired that he screams for an hour… well, you get the idea. Needless to say, we have been learning a ton in the past few months. I’m so grateful for the times my sisters and friends and other family members let me care for their little ones. I would be lost even more without those experiences.
We’ve been having a bit of a hard time figuring out sleep around here. We didn’t want to impose a strict routine on little Asher Henry, for lots of reasons: we want him to eat when he’s hungry, sleep when he’s tired, we wanted him to be flexible, etc. And we didn’t want to be THOSE people who can never go anywhere or do anything because their kid has to read 4.5 books, sing 3 songs, have a bath, and be asleep by 7.01pm every night. But in our efforts not to be those people, we turned into those people because our days are so unpredictable. And it just isn’t working. He’s not settled. We’re going stir crazy.
My mom said to me the other day, “Maybe he needs fewer naps.” Well, yes, that makes sense. He has been growing and changing and we have to adjust with him. So we are trying out a new schedule. Today is the first day. And it’s going beautifully so far. Wish us luck!